Thomas McVey Dowling of North Stonington, CT, passed away peacefully at his home the night of December 29th, 2025, embraced by his loving wife Kimberley and three sons, Matthew, Michael, and James.
Tom was born in St. Louis, Missouri on November 11th, 1963. He was the fourth of six children to Jack and Ellie (Christen) Dowling. Tom was a 1982 graduate of St. Bernard High School in Uncasville, CT; a 1986 graduate of UConn with a B.S. in Chemistry; and, a 1991 graduate of
UMass Amherst with an M.S. and PhD in Analytical Chemistry.
Tom spent his early childhood in Lubbock, TX where he discovered his love for baseball. For most of his early life, Tom never went anywhere without his catcher’s mitt and his steadfast canine companion, Poppy, who Tom brought with him when his family moved to North Stonington, CT in 1969. One of his favorite early memories was when his little league team, coached by his brother, Matt and managed by his father, Jack, won the 1976 Tournament of Champions.
Tom’s life became even sweeter during the summer of 1983, when he took a job as a waiter at J.P. Daniels in Mystic, CT. It was there that he would work alongside his future wife, Kim. They quickly hit it off and the rest was history. After hopping around various locations temporarily for
work, they eventually settled for 30 years in Hillsborough, NJ. Then, in 2023, Tom and Kim achieved their long-term goal of returning home to North Stonington, where they built a beautiful new house together. Tom took great pride in landscaping and maintaining his family's property, always dreaming up the next big home-improvement project.
Tom raised a wonderful family with Kim and their three boys. He proved himself to be a great father, coaching several seasons of his boys’ baseball teams; cooking delicious meals for his family; raising his sons to be hardworking, kind, humble, and curious; and, providing a calm
presence in their lives. His sons found great comfort in having a father that was a source of so much support and wisdom.
Tom was immensely fortunate to have a deeply fulfilling career in the pharmaceutical industry. He helped author numerous research papers and patents and contributed to the development of multiple medications that improved the lives of countless families. His first job after getting his PhD was working for Merck in the lab. Eventually, he transitioned out of the lab into working on the regulatory affairs side of the business; however, his heart always yearned to return to the lab.
After Merck, he worked at Celgene for over a decade, and for the past 5 years he’s worked at Praxis Precision Medicines. At Praxis, Tom supported projects for people living with essential tremor and both common and rare forms of epilepsy. The work Tom did at Praxis gave him a deep sense of meaning and purpose. On top of his successful career, Tom greatly enjoyed all the friendships he made with the many wonderful people he worked with.
Tom will be remembered for his many hobbies and passions. As a teen in North Stonington, he helped with raising the family’s farm animals, growing a vegetable garden, and working as a farmhand. He also enjoyed raising his own show cows for 4-H, Blossom and Alice. Tom’s early experience with raising animals and gardening were what seeded his lifelong passion for taking care of his home and garden. In his adult life, Tom became a bonsai aficionado, and he had a special ability to take wild plants he found and cultivate their natural beauty into deeply serene and meaningful works of art. Sports were another central theme in Tom’s life. In high school, he played football and baseball, and throughout his life he enjoyed all kinds of exercise, including lifting weights, swimming, biking, and running. He raced various distances up to the marathon and half ironman, and in recent years he was a regular at the Lake George Triathlon, which he raced alongside his sons. Tom’s many other passions included pen-making, photography, scuba
diving, maintaining fish tanks, dirt bike riding, welding, model trains and airplanes, magic, and reading.
Tom’s life was not free from challenges. In 2014, Tom courageously fought hard and won against colon cancer. In 2025, he again battled cancer, this time cholangiocarcinoma, with strength, determination, and grace. Despite the tragic outcome, he remained thankful for all of
the people who supported and loved him.
Tom also had a deep spiritual life, a source of strength for him during “The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.” He received the sacraments of first communion, confirmation, and marriage at St. Thomas More Church. He received his last rites at home prior to his passing, and all who knew
his character have no doubt that he has already joined his father, Jack in heaven.
Tom is survived by his loving wife, Kim and his three sons Matt, Mike, and Jim; his mother Ellie and his siblings and their families: John and his daughters Kaitlyn and Kristen; Mary Jane
Kinman and her husband Brian and their daughter Annie; Matt Dowling and his wife Susan and their daughter Haley; Liz Forstmeier and her husband Ken and their children John, Thomas, Marceline, Michael, Peter, and Christopher; and Tricia Shippee and her husband Bart and their children Rachael and Stephen. Tom is also survived by his mother-in-law Charlotte Gross and his sister-in-law Lisa Gray, her husband Charlie, and their children Jess and Austin.
He is predeceased by his father, Dr. Jack Dowling and his father-in-law John B. Gross.
Friends and family may call from 4 p.m. until 7 p.m. Friday, January 9, at the Dinoto Funeral Home, 17 Pearl St, Mystic, CT 06355. A Funeral Mass will be celebrated at 10 a.m. on Saturday, January 10, at St. Michael the Archangel Church, 60 Liberty St, Pawcatuck, CT 06379. The Rite of Committal will follow at St. Michael Cemetery, Stillman Avenue Extension, Pawcatuck, CT 06379.
Donations in Tom’s memory may be made to donate.v.org.
If you have a story about Tom, feel free to submit it at the link below. We are hoping to compile them into a book honoring him. https://forms.gle/XAnZmSSXWXsW93bU9